Going To Church; I Just Want To Be A Spectator Participant - Is That Wrong?

So getting to church service on Sunday mornings is problematic for me during the summer months.  I umpire a lot of softball, and with grandchildren now, Amber and I find ourselves with little ones on Sunday mornings.  While I don't keep track of my attendance, I'm pretty sure I haven't attended service all summer long.  I miss it - sort of.  I really miss seeing the efforts of Pastor Paul, I miss the positive messages and music, and I miss seeing the other members of the church.  The "sort of" is that I don't want to LEAD. 

Let me try to explain this.

When I'm umpiring or officiating, my role is to manage and lead and be helpful.  Players, coaches, fans, umpiring/officiating partners look to me with expectations that I will perform my role of management and leadership to help the game or contest move along positively.  When I'm teaching, students, parents, staff, administrators look to me with expectations that I will again perform my role of management and leadership to help students improve their skills and ability. 

I signed up for those expectations when I decided to officiate, umpire, and teach.  I get it.

In addition, my wife, family, and friends also occasionally look to me to expect that I will perform the role of husband, dad, sibling, family member, and friend and help them with their lives too.

I "signed up" to be a husband, and family and friends deserve my efforts to help lead when I'm needed and available and able to do so.  I get that too, and I feel honored to be able to give back to those folks for all of the blessings I've enjoyed because of them.

After I met Amber, she encouraged me to explore the church I currently belong to.  Amber and I were married in the church, and met and developed a friendship with the pastor, and as he and Amber encouraged me to do so, I became a member.  I did so with hesitation because I already am stretched pretty far in terms of available time, energy, and money resources.

And despite my best attempts to simply be a spectator and passive participant, I soon was being asked to be a liturgist and eventually found my way onto a committee.  Those things don't require a great deal of time and energy, but they were things in addition to my already normal hectic daily schedule.

I'm struggling with the feeling that while I miss the positive things about church service, I don't miss the potential expectations to lead something - be a liturgist, join another committee, participate in some fundraising event, sing some type of song, etc...  If I am able to attend service, I just want to enjoy it.  I will make a generous contribution to the offering, but I just want to spectate.  I want to go to the "concert" to watch and sing and learn something.  I don't want to go to the concert and be asked to participate or asked to do something else.

Here's the rub.  I know the church needs a certain number of people to do more than just be a member; do more than just show up occasionally at a service; do more than just spectate and contribute to the offering.  There is NO WAY the church accomplishes what it does without more help - without more leadership.

I feel guilty, and I feel like I'm not upholding expectations of being a member of the church.  I feel like I should be willing to do more or not be a member at all.  That's what I'm struggling with.